Failure™ Magazine

College Try

High School and the high cost of high achievement.

Written by Jason Zasky   Filed under Life

Can you explain the term “helicopter parent”?
A helicopter parent is a parent who hovers over a child and swoops in whenever there is a problem to solve that problem for the child. They are always hovering over the student’s shoulder. Lately I have been hearing the term “kamikaze parent” and also “lawnmower parent,” which refers to a parent who will mow down anything to make the path easier for their child.

How do you think the colleges and universities feel about this trend towards overachieving?
I’ve heard from some admissions officers who are glad “The Overachievers” was written, because sometimes they get as fed up with the myths as families do.

Is this a good time to be applying for college?
It’s a competitive time to be applying for college. If you keep everything in perspective, there are 2,500 four-year colleges in the United States, most of which are going to bend over backwards to accept any good student. So as long as you choose schools that aren’t rejecting more than 90 percent of their applicants it doesn’t have to be that stressful a process. Too many people focus on the same 10 to 20 schools year after year. These are schools that in many cases are over-hyped and over-estimated.

Is there anything that can be done to change the competitive environment in education?
There are a whole bunch of suggestions in “The Overachievers.” Most importantly students and parents need to know that the admissions process is not personal, whether we are talking about private school admissions or college admissions. An admissions letter doesn’t reflect anything about a student’s character. Sometimes the difference between an acceptance letter and a rejection letter is just the fact that the school orchestra needs a French horn player.

Also, it’s important not to get caught up in the comparison game where parents talk about their children or kids talk to other kids about their grades, scores, or their college applications. Nobody comes out looking good and nobody feels good after that. I advise parents and students to make a pact with each other not to talk about any of those things outside of the family, with the possible exception of a guidance/college counselor. Too many students are fine with their grades and their scores and their college application list until they start talking to other people. Then suddenly they feel inadequate for some reason.

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