Failure™ Magazine

Man fills book with words unfit for the dictionary, invites submissions

Written by Jason Zasky as part of Failure Analysis

January 2, 2010 — Getting a new word into Merriam-Webster’s Dictionary is easier said than done, which explains why Ron Gagliardi, 62, a retired teacher from Cheshire, Connecticut, decided to publish his own. Last month—during the same week Merriam-Webster was touting “admonish” as its 2009 Word of the Year—Gagliardi issued the first edition of “Noah’s Desktionary and Allmanack,” a self-published book that features words he thinks should be in the dictionary, but aren’t.

As you’ve probably guessed by the book’s title, Gagliardi is paying homage to Noah Webster, who published the first American dictionary in the early nineteenth century. In fact, Gagliardi, who serves on the board of trustees at the New Haven [Connecticut] Museum and Historical Society, claims to have been inspired by Webster—or at least by working in close proximity to Webster’s desk and personal effects, which happen to be housed at the museum.

He has a long way to go before his self-described “minor league” dictionary ($15) reaches Webster-esque proportions, however. The 2009 “Desktionary” (defined as: a personal desk dictionary) contains approximately 150 words, surprisingly few considering that he began compiling his list in 1974. (By comparison, Merriam-Webster added almost 100 new words last year alone, including “carbon footprint,” “flash mob,” “staycation,” and “webisode.”)

But Gagliardi is optimistic that the 2010 edition will be considerably more substantial—not to mention available via national booksellers. With traditional media helping spread the word, he’s already received upwards of 15 outside submissions deemed worthy of inclusion. And with a “committee of one” reviewing entries, there is no requirement that the words “be used in … a wide range of publications over a considerable period of time,” as is the case with Merriam-Webster.

At the moment, Gagliardi—who describes himself as a “kidult” (which he defines as an adult who has never made it to adulthood maturity-wise)—is actively seeking submissions for 2010, and hoping that word lovers from around the world flood his email with words as worthy as: enthusazilist (a person who enthusiastically uses “a to z” lists to be creative); neverauthorphobia (fear of being published); and O.P.I.A.O. (an acronym for “only positivity in and out”).

Meanwhile, just like Merriam-Webster, he’s chosen a Word of the Year for 2009, explaining: “I’m a New York Yankees fan and I was watching a Yankees game this past summer when one of the announcers said, ‘That was a Jeterian play.’ I immediately thought to myself, that’s a word that needs to be promoted.”

Gagliardi invites readers to send submissions to elgaggo at aol dot-com.